When I read about in reputable , I relate to almost everything that is described (keeping in mind that no two autistic people are alike). However, I always read the sections on with bewilderment. I don't identify either with the obsessive need to make eye contact, which UK and US books often mention as behavior, or with the difficulties in making it.
Unless I am attracted to the person I almost never maintain eye contact while talking to them. I’m from Greece btw, doing eye contact is normal, I see others do it, so I diverge there.
Is it eye contact or is it looking at the face, in general? I never thought I had a problem in this department unter I started reading about ASD. Do people look at the eyes like when they make a toast? It feels unnatural to mee. My observation is that people look at the face, in general, without focusing on the eyes exactly, except for short intervals. It would seem strange to me if someone fixated on my eyes this way and I don't think that people do like that.
Definitely people here do intense full locked eye contact, which I can’t do, unless I’m attracted to the person as I said. Even then I’ll move a bit around the face because it’s uncomfortable even then. But others just lock in completely I see them doing it.
OK. I guess that Greece may be similar to Spain. I feel comfortable hanging with greeks, in Greece and elswhere. Then, if I don't look at the eyes, but others do. I guess that I'm very good at masking that I don't look at the eyes. I never got a comment related to eye contact.
I don’t think it’s something people notice immediately and consciously think this is wrong to make a comment, they will probably just not feel the same connection or feel something is off about you in general or think that you’re busy thinking other things. It’s not the only case to not make eye contact with someone, you might just not like them. That’s probably what they will sense.