8. Viewing friend-making as a market.
Those who have this view will see you as a static product against which they immediately match, or they assume nothing is possible. If you have, like any normal living being, a lick of complexity, their snap judgement will be full of wrong assumptions. Alas sometimes this is also done by persons who otherwise could be decent friends. They create their own missed opportunities.
I'd call that a straight up red flag now.
wrote:Some of my warning signs for failing friendships—a thread. I happen to care a lot about friendships, so for me when they break it's quite salient. I spent a lot of time thinking about them, read academic articles of sociology and psychology on the topic, etc. What I'm going to talk about is typically reserved for romantic relationships, while friendships are comparatively disinvested and set aside (that's amatonormativity), so if it sounds like I care too much, that's why, don't @ me.